Boss attacks: Video Ads

“Hotpop ranks her rule thirty four fan art? Yes please,” a voice reads as the mouse pointer moves over a mildly suggestive thumbnail of the naga. A click starts the video, but only for an ad to cut in first. “Man, I need to spring for premium one of these days. Unskipable ads are the worse.”

 

“Tell me, has this ever happened to you?” a deep-voiced narrator asks the viewer as the image of a beach loads. People are running around in a panic, pointing and screaming at something off-screen.

 

“Oh no, its an evil siren. If only there were someone to save us,” Bertrand read his lines off a sheet of paper. The raven man adjusted his mask to ensure he read the sheet correctly. “Who wrote this script? It needs a…” 

 

Bertrand is cut off as the camera cuts away from him. A loud soundtrack starts playing as the screen stops on Kattfisk playing a set at a DJ booth. The fish folk were too distracted putting on a show to notice the large crudely made cardboard cut out of Laguna, who started dancing across the screen. When asked later, no one would remember hiring Kattfisk, but his free music and light show a nice touch.

 

“Oh no, the siren is coming for me,” Bertrand yelled sarcastically as the cardboard Laguna shakily approached. If only there were a hero to save us.”

 

“Good news citizen there’s not one but two heroes to save the day,” Kaytlyn shouts as she comes hurtling out of the sky wearing her pink mech armor, F3NN3C P1NK. As she did a superhero landing, Kattfisk seemingly took the cue and switched over to more heroic music. 

 

“Hot P1NK is here to vanquish monsters,” Hotpop said directly into the camera as she, the naga, slithered into the frame. She was wearing her orange plasma armor and looked ready for a fight.

 

What followed next was a montage of Kaytlyn and Hotpop “fighting” different “boss enemies.” In reality, the two were pretending to hit or shoot cardboard cutouts, and special effects were poorly added in post-production. Occasionally, the camera would cut back to Bertrand, who was supposed to look on in awe but looked rather bored and annoyed instead. Ever the professional, Kattfisk didn’t miss any of his musical cues, although it wasn’t clear if he even knew he was in an ad.

 

“So if you need saving just look to the sky and call for Team Hot P1NK,” Kaytlyn instructs as she punches the cardboard cut out of Laguna in half.

 

“And we will be there in a flash,” Hotpop finishes the statement as special effects ignite the fallen villain facsimile. As the ad ends, the video of the naga fades in, and all is right in the online streaming world once again.