The ocean's Vessel: A new Petal

Published Nov 6, 2023, 9:21:37 PM UTC | Last updated Nov 6, 2023, 9:21:37 PM | Total Chapters 3

Story Summary

[Header image is a placeholder!]

Follow the stories of Vessel, a small Pygmy singer on his adventure of the journey called 'Adulthood'. 
Accompany him with many of his friends such as his companion 'Nibbles' a drone crafted in the appearance of an Blue Tang.

(TW's will be included in each chapters header)

Jump to chapter body

Art RPG

Characters in this Chapter

Vessel Dragons of Aquella 🧑🏽 #aq730
1113 total points
33 approved points

Visibility

  • ✅ is visible in artist's gallery and profile
  • ✅ is visible in art section and tag searches

Chapter 1: A new Petal

Featured Aqrions:

 

                            Mochi                                                                          Vessel

Location: Ocean, Mochi’s Sanctuary

Age: Hatchling

Activity: Trial #1 Balance

Guide: Mochi (Starter)

Wordcount: 1.008


 

      Everything was dark, blue gleaming eyes darting around the small confined space, trying to make out something, anything in this darkness. Even as comforting as this tight space was, how warm it felt around one's skin, one could not ignore the voice that called from outside, telling the little creature inside that big things were waiting behind those tight walls. With all its strength the small being puckered up all its small courage and stretched out its body, it could feel the walls caving in, restraining movement even more than before. Yet the small creature did not falter, the urge to survive was too overwhelming in that little brain. 

 

After turning and straining its small little muscles a small tear appeared emitst the colors of black and red. The small body flinched upon the overwhelming sensation of something bright and warm grazing its sleek skin. With a last surge of courage and strength, the small being escaped the cladding walls of its prison. Now fully emerged in light the small being opened its eyes, vision blurry, the sensation hurtful. It took a few more blinks until its eyes adjusted to the harsh light of the outside.

 

And suddenly, a small black male pygmy singer was born, striking blue eyes, a soft plated shell on his back, that would take at least two weeks to harden, a small cute little beak, and tufts of fur on his back. Though he had only hit the first obstacle so far, another challenge had forced its weight on him, Air.

Something so ordinary and insignificant for other creatures, yet here he was, feeling his lungs ache. 

 

Suddenly he saw a shadow above him, his wee little brain not able to register danger yet, he stood still, slowly drifting in the current as exhaustion claimed his small frail body. The shadow swiftly made its way beneath his body, pressing him up towards the surface of the blue water. As the water rippled open his blue eyes opened up once more, seeing even more colors now than before, his body tensed up and relaxed as he finally took his first-ever breath, his blowhole opening and closing in excitement upon the sensation of fresh air filling his lungs. 

 

His body jerked with a big gasp as he descended back into the water. Now he felt truly alive, his brain fed with oxygen that gave him the gift of a conscious mind.

Once more his eyes darted around, this time for real, he looked upon the creature that lifted him out of the water and gifted him the sensation of life, it was Mochi, his grandmother, which he would eventually learn. 

By instinct his eyes darted around the elderly female, observing how she used her body to move around, >>Just use your body, petal, let me show you.<< her voice so soft and quiet, it felt like a flower blooming inside the ears of everyone nearby. The small aqrion jiggled in the water as he tried to mimic her, accidentally flipping onto his tiny back, squirming and twisting while sudden panic took hold of him, causing him to whimper in distress. 

 

Mochi’s great perception of her surroundings allowed her to sense even the slightest change in the current, making her missing eyesight obsolete >>Now, now small one,<< she whispered, her voice laced with amusement as she helped the small one to flip upright again >>Just do like grandma does, petal.<< Thanks to her quick help and soothing voice the small pup was able to overcome his panic, trying to mimic her once more. It was stiff, clumsy, and a weak attempt at swimming, but this time he was able to move, was it in the intended direction, no, but it was a successful step to build muscles that he would soon need.

 

A few more minutes passed as the small aqrion finally managed to build some form of control over his body functions, allowing him to swim on his own, it wasn’t yet skillful, nor would save him from any possible threat, but at least he could move around, even if it was just a little. Mochi stayed close to him, feeling him with her pectoral fins and her sonar, helping him as his small body slowly built up more muscles.

 

Eventually, as dawn broke over the ocean, the black pygmy had multiple small tiny breakthroughs, for his small size they were huge and filled him with a sense of pride. Mochi in the meantime, tried to contain the hatchling as she tried to remove the remnants of his egg, while also trying not to poke one of his eyes out or clip one of his flippers with her strong beak. 

 

>>Finally.<< Mochi sighed as she sensed the wave of exhaustion crashing over the small pup. Now she could finally rest after numerous stressful weeks of egg guarding. She had spent countless days guarding this clutch of eggs, and finally, one of which had hatched, she nearly gave up as she had found this pile of eggs next to a prosthetic that was well known in the seven seas of this earth. 

 

Moch inhaled once more as she watched the small Pygmy yawn >>You know, Petal,<< she started, her voice strained with emotions >>You are one of the last eggs from someone, someone that was very dear to me.<< her words sounded like a lullaby he couldn’t understand, laced with words he couldn’t know yet, in a language that his small brain could not decypher yet, and still, he felt the emotions behind them, he knew what he heard was important, to Mochi and possibly to him as well. 

 

The Jasmin-colored aqrion, with shimmering scales like the first morning lights, descended upon the soft sand of her coral reef, the small hatchling tightly stashed beneath her pectoral fins to shelter him from the harsh cold waves of the night. The small aqrion brushed his fragile body against his grandmother, absorbing her comforting warmth, his beak slowly opening as he prepared to strain his vocal cords.

 

>>--<<

Post a comment

Please login to post comments.

Comments

  • Nov 8, 2023, 5:41:20 AM UTC
    I enjoyed the read! I liked reading the moments before Vessel/Petal was hatched and the instinct to survive.

    I think something that could improve your writing style is reducing the amount of similar adjectives you use. It's all right to sometimes use descriptions like "wee little" which both mean small. But I think you over use it a bit. Reducing it will make it read better in the future and make it take longer to exhaust your vocabulary before repeats. As well as increase the impact for when you do decide to double up like that.

    My favorite part was reading how Vessel/Petal struggled to learn how to swim correctly. But the perspective of their small progress being big to him. It was heart warming to see the concept of how progress should only be measured against yourself.
    • Nov 8, 2023, 10:15:09 AM UTC | Total Edits: 1 | Last edited on Nov 8, 2023 by RehARPG
      Oh! Thank you so much for the great critique! <3

      Yes I can see what you mean with the repeating words, I had some troubles the longer the writing went on (I feel like the start is the best from the writing, but then it deteriorated in quality as I found myself in a pickle of how to continue :'3 )

      I always thought using "double" would emphasize it better and 'describe' it better xD

      I will keep your words in mind for my next writing! Hopefully it will be better and consistent in quality <3 /gen