It's finally done.  This project that's been eating me up for...well, ever... is finished.  And edited.  And now I'm cross-eyed.

Well, not really, but my head hurts and I'm done looking at this and drawing a blank at what to do after editing it.  That's where I ask someone with a fresh take on it to critique, if you feel up to it.

I have it on 'Roast Me', but it's not drawing too much attention.  I'm thinking it's because of the length; so fair warning, yes it's long.

Then again, I could be stroking my own ego and it just sucks...

http://www.paperdemon.com/writing/view/2430

Thanks in advance.

Jeni

Give a little paragraph of what the story is about here and what kind of crit you want. I can't guarranty I'll have time to read it, but someone else may ^^

Do realise writing crit is REALLY difficult to do :<

Hey, there's no guarantee in life but death and taxes, right?  ...right?  :nosmile:

Anyhow...

It's a high fantasy story is about an amazon named Aelixia, who would rather be chosen as shaman's apprentice, despite her mother's wishes.  But her life changes when the Guardian's gift corrupts her magic; she is exiled from her clan into the outland territories, and becomes enslaved under the guise of 'being taught' her new gifts, to the one whom it was written in prophecy she was supposed to destroy.

I was rather straightforward in the intro what I was looking for - tell me if it stalls, or if something doesn't make sense.  I'm not looking for hard-core editors, but I'd like to know that it's a decent story or if there's things I still need to explain.  The only REALLY difficult thing I see about critiquing it is just getting through it.  But that's just me...

It's ok to do alil begging sometimes. :yes: