Essays and Vignettes: The Good Mom (A Debate)

Ashley couldn’t resist the urge to sing softly to herself as she checked in books. Today was going really well. The library was just busy enough to keep her working consistently, but not so busy that she was feeling frantic. Time was passing quickly and it wouldn’t be long until she could go home. 

 

    The computer beeped softly as she checked in another book. The new self check machines were an interesting addition to the library. They could check out and check in, but they couldn’t sort and label books that were supposed to be saved for others, so Ashley had the slightly redundant joy of checking in books that had already been checked in, looking for holds. 

 

    Slightly boring, but at least it was something to do. 

 

    It also kept her where the patrons could see her if they needed her, which was really her primary job. Be Helpful. Say Yes First. So when she overheard a young mother telling her two daughters to “ask her nicely”, she smiled and turned to greet them. 

 

    “Hi! What can I do for you today?” she smiled warmly at the oldest, who was around seven years old and carrying an enormously oversized purse. 

 

    Her voice was hesitant and she glanced back at her mom for support, “Um… Do you have any Thea Stilton books?”

 

    Ashley smiled at her in encouragement, “You know, I’m not sure. Let’s go over to that computer,” she pointed to the computer in the juvenile section, “and use the catalogue to find out.” 

 

    She led the way to the computer, trailing the 7 year old with her oversized pink purse followed by the five year old with her oversized Hello Kitty purse, and their mother whose purse was the same size as her daughters’. 

 

    She stood off to the side of the computer and let the oldest daughter step up to the front. “This is where you can access the catalogue. The catalogue has all of the information about which books we have and where to find them. So, the first thing you’re going to do is click here.” she pointed to the search bar, but the seven year old wasn’t looking. She was watching her sister dig around in her purse. 

 

    Her mother noticed the inattention and put her hand gently on the top of her oldest’s head and turned her to face Ashley. Her voice was understanding, but stern “The lady is talking to you Mary.” 

 

    Mary blinked and looked up at Ashley again. Obviously she’d missed what she’d said, so Ashley pointed again. “Click here and type in the title you want to find.”

 

    Mary stood on tiptoe to get a good look at the keyboard. She painstakingly sought and found each letter. 

 

    Ashley smiled down at the five year old while waiting for Mary to finish her slow typing. The five year old grinned widely back then turned to show off her purse. “I have my own purse!” she said proudly, “just like Momma!” She opened it and started digging around “and I have my own wallet too!” She pulled it out and showed it to Ashley, who made sure to look appropriately impressed. 

 

    The little girl opened it up and showed her every pocket. Ashley made sure to nod when the conversation called for it while she watched Mary’s progress. Occasionally, she would interrupt the youngest to point out the next step of the process for the eldest, but it didn’t slow the little one down at all. 

 

    “My wallet is Hello Kitty! I love Hello Kitty. I have a Hello Kitty wallet and a Hello Kitty watch and…” 

 

    Their mother stood off to the side and shared a smile with Ashley about children and their obsessions. 

 

    It wasn’t long until Ashley wasn’t needed anymore. Mary now knew the basics of searching the catalogue and how to find what she needed and the littlest had been distracted by the legos on the nearby table. She stepped back to put some distance between herself and the family and nodded, “If there’s anything else I can help you with, please don’t hesitate to ask.” 

 

    The mother smiled, then frowned as she realized that her daughters weren’t listening. “What do you say girls?” She prompted,  her voice flavored just a touch with disapproval. 

 

    Both girls’ heads whipped around, then they  smiled at Ashley “Thank you!”

 

    She returned the smile, “You’re very welcome.” 

 

Ashley felt a warm glow as she walked back to her desk. It always felt so nice to teach children things.

 

She sat back down in her dilapidated desk chair, automatically catching herself from falling too far backward. She’d only been back at the task of checking items in for a few minutes before a new family walked up to the desk. 

 

She smiled up at the new family, “Hi! What can I do for you today?” 

 

The mother smiled distractedly while her two girls, 11 and 5, peered cautiously around her sides. “Yes, I’d like to sign my girls up for the summer reading program.” 

 

Ashley’s smiled widened “Awesome!” She looked at the oldest and asked “What grade are you going into?”

 

Her mother answered for her, “she’s going into fourth.” 

 

Ashley eyes glanced up at the mom, then back at the girl, who didn’t say anything. 

 

She transferred her smile to the youngest, “and what grade are you going into?” she cheered. 

 

Her mother’s voice was slightly irritated, “She’s going into second.” 

 

“Fantastic!” Ashley cried, overacting the way adults often do around children. “You’re both going to be in the children’s program!” She leaned over and grabbed a pair of children’s reading logs. Without missing a beat she launched into her summer reading spiel, keeping her attention on the two girls. “Okay! Over the summer you need to read at least eight books and visit us four times. If you visit us four times and get four stickers and read eight books, you get the first prize which is a medal!” She lowered her voice and leaned forward to emphasize just how cool a medal it was. The girls smiled. Their mother frowned. 

 

“If you visit us four times and go all the way and read twenty books,” she paused for effect, “You win that!” she pointed at the large three foot inflatable baseball bat. Then she turned and wagged her finger playfully at them, “Which you’re not supposed to hit your sister with.”

 

The girls giggled. 

 

The mother huffed. 

 

“Any questions?” The girls shook their heads. 

 

Ashley held out the reading logs to the girls, but before they could even think about taking them, their mother reached down and gathered both reading logs into her hands. 

 

“Thank you.” she said, no trace of a smile on her face. “Come on girls.” she ordered as she turned away and herded them in front of her. 

 

Ashley watched as the two moms and their two daughters passed each other in the juvenile section and couldn’t help but wonder which one was the good mom. The one who made her daughters do everything for themselves, or the one who did everything herself for her daughters.