Something that has bugged me for AGES in life, since I was a kid is this- beauty.

See, I'll admit that I have some good genes in me, cause as long as I'm smileing, I'll eminate some degree of pretty. In saying this, I was still considered ugly throughout my WHOLE school career. Near the end though, I notice one thing that changed my outlook on the whole beauty thing-

• There were 'fat' kids that had 10 times more friends than me
• Most of the kids hated the pretty people anyway
• Even though people wished to heck that they were 'popular', noone could ever tell me what popular was.

This is when I realised somethign REALLY important.

Beauty is ego. Not about size, colour, or age. Those are just first impression things

Beauty is about having character, cause see, this is what I noticed when I observed people

• The popular 'fat' kids (When I say fat, they were over weight, but I think that was just genetic weight) were all into theatre sports, debating, or some other club, they were getting off their asses and trying new things. They also were smiling and happy all the time.
• The popular kids may have been pretty, but in the process of becoming pretty, they put so much priority on the cosmetic look that they lost sight of WHY they wanted to be pretty in the first place
• Popularity... I'm WAY more popular now days thatn I ever was as a kid, for a VERY simple reason why- I meet new people, I don't discriminate them, and I proactively try to be friends with everyone. How is this NOT popularity? Isn't this what we did as kids at school even on a minor level? 

What is everyone's take on popularity and beauty, cause to me, it's really in the eye of the beholder. Anyone can be beautiful if we make everyone around us feel wanted. Beauty is confidence in self, and postive thinking.

Others may have other thoughts though. What's your experiances?

Yes this is a very interesting point. If you are good at interacting with people, the looks don't really matter so much. People will like you based on your personality.

I think we eventually all figure this out. But I really wish I had learned it when I was younger. I had a tough time growing up, got picked on a lot. I thought it was because I was ugly. But it was because I couldn't figure out how to interact with people. I often think about how I would explain all this to my kids (when I eventually have them). Because kids can be so damn mean in school.

Exactly. It's primal really. They're all trying to find out who's boss and who isn't. IF you display weakness, they'l profit on that, makign themselves look good, but if you ignore them, and go and do your own thing in your own way, you'll realise that alot of people will like you even IF they aren't into the same stuff. Positivity is infectious and those that don't like the real you, weren't gonna like you anyways.

Now days, I always think the best of people, and always give when ever I can. Even if your heart doesn't seem like its truely appreciated, in the end, people aren't horrible. They're just close hearted cause they don't know who you are.

You always have alot more going on than you really think. I always thought I was unpopular, but really, I had some of the best friends a girl could have. I was so caught up wanting to be something I wasn't, when I should've been fighting for it.

You only get what you put in with EVERYTHING in life I believe.

I have to agree with you.  I was never 'popular' in high school (to me, that meant being flocked with 'friends' everywhere you went).  I was too shy.  (HA!  no longer!)

But I wan't unpopular, either, so to speak.  At least, not in senior high.  I didn't really have any enemies, per se, but I wasn't in any large cliques.  I think I didn't get picked on mostly because I was nice to people...

And now, I don't really care so much what other people think about how I look, or what I wear, or anything...  And I'm not so afraid to speak out, either. Hm...  I think it might be plain old maturity in my case.  ;)

Beauty is fat, black, white, skinny, yellow, red, short, tall, blue-eyed, green-eyed, Brown-eyed, hazel, indigo, yellow, voilet, or even black eyes.
Beauty is kinky hair, curly hair, short hair, long hair wavy and straight. It's in redheads and blondes.
Beauty is the way that someone smiles - even if their teeth are missing or yellow.
 

But most of all, beauty is flawed. And those with flaws are beautiful.

Ok, now that that is out of my system. I do think that each person is truly beautiful in ther own way, I could focus on the negatives of myself and everyone around me, but I chose not to. I see a mother with her kids, she probibly hasn't shaved her legs in months, she's not wearing any make-up, she might be overweight. But I acknowlage her, and smile. Why? Because she has a beauty in her. It could be her eyes, her hair. But it is there.
I think that might be my outlook though, I can't say that everyone thinks like I do. Not everyone stops and smiles at the janitors of their school, or stops to help them pick something up. But I did have that job, I know what it is like to have people ignore your presence.

Start a revolution - find beauty in everyone and everything :).

This is very true ^^ I think everyone is beautiful in their own way weven if they don't realise it. Life inheirantly is full of passion, and if people don't find that attractive and glorious, then they need to slow down and really LOOK at the world finally, cause a negative person actually looks dead when you look at them, which is why they don't get attention.

People want to be surrounded by positivity. Negativity is a burden. That's why I don't get the emo culture- it's very anti sociable. I'd actually like to know the appeal- is it just the fashion? Or is it more?

On Mar 29, 2009 2:29 pm, arkillian said:
[quote]

People want to be surrounded by positivity. Negativity is a burden. That's why I don't get the emo culture- it's very anti sociable. I'd actually like to know the appeal- is it just the fashion? Or is it more?

[/quote]

Punk, and gothic culture are also appear to be anti-social and sometimes down right antagonistic but they feel themsleves united into a community by seeing the same things the same way. 

I don't really understand the emo subculture, truth be told, they sometimes they annoy the crap out of me.  Nonetheless, from the snippets I get from it it's tied mostly into the music -- that usually how these things go.  A new style of music branches off and a new subculture is developed by the fans.  I think the music is probably the most important aspect to it as well the whole sensitive to one's emotions. 

And not everybody wants posititivity.   I know there was a period in my life where it got pretty dark and negative.  We all can't be rays of sunshine all the time.

But being sad can also be beautiful.  Think of it like rain -- we need it so when it finally breaks we can really appreciate the sunshine.

But back to the beautiful thing ... I never bothered with what I looked like when I was growing up, it was only later on when I started growing up that I started to notice and kind of actually cared.  I never considered myself popular, or very well liked, which resulted in me thinking there was something wrong with me physically, because who can hate a pretty person right?  I grew up and realized that children are naive and cruel, especially in small rural schools.  It was when my social circle grew that I realized its not about how you look but you're personality.  If you have a lovely personality , it shows through and it attracts people and that alone makes you beautiful.

However people get blinded by what the media is trying to sell down our throats.  Take for example, Paris Hilton.   She's supposedly beautiful, and sure I'm sure she makes all the important criteria in some petty lists but really, I think she's an ugly person because of her personality.

And if you have an ugly personality there's no hiding it, and maaaan is it ugly.

I know I'm a little slow to reply but I have something I would like to add. I started off with snooty people because I look like "one of them" but I wasn't at heart, I ventured off and found my own friends, some i have been friends with for 15years now. I always had people asking me why i was hanging around my friends because I looked so out of place. They thought I was there because I pittied them but when they found out they were my friends I got worse hell for it.

All that aside, my friends were considered losers but to me they were the most beautiful people. To me, true beauty comes from those that have something to show from their suffering. People that have the worst life and still remain truely happy and smiling, not just putting on a smile for show. it was so hard to become their friend though because the sterotypically asthetically pleasing people before me more or less ruined their perceptions on meeting someone "pretty" but I know why as I have been teased and tormented by them as well.

I hate being pretty because it puts up so many barriers. I really do think that true beauty is only skin deep and that in rare cases it can go either way. There is no chance in hell that I would ever defend beautiful people though unless I knew for a fact that they were beautiful on the inside as well... though I have yet to meet one...

I admire peopel that go through accidents or sickness in life, and still manage to remain on top. An ego isn't a beatufiul thing, and I think people forget that. In sayign that, I sometimes wonder if it's just the people I hang around with that understand that same mindset. It must be a lonely world for beautiful people that are shallowwhen they realise that they don't actually have true friends :(

Arkillian: That would be assumed, if it were true. They don't care if they're lonely- they'll just find someone that'll suck up to them and "befriend" them until they can find someone new.

I hated being like that, and as soon as I could, I left the "popular" crowd, since I knew they only wanted things from me. I had my own group of friends, but they were no better than anyone from the "popular" crowd- if they didn't know someone very well, or if the person was different, they'd make fun of them.

When I finally spoke up when they were bashing a nice girl because she dresses differently and acts differently, they all shut up, and stared at me in shock. I wasn't supposed to have my own opinions, I was just supposed to go along with them. That's what they wanted from me. And I walked off, and sat with the girl they had been bashing.

To this day I'm one of her best friends, and that whole group of people are all people I now hate.

On topic though, beauty is not skin deep in my opinion. Not many people can control the way they look, or if they have the chance, they don't have enough money to do so.